The Sober Living Stories Podcast

Breaking Free: Transforming Your Life in 75 Days

February 27, 2024 Jessica Stipanovic Season 1 Episode 16

Ever felt an unmistakable pull towards a more authentic, purpose-driven life, but found yourself unable to break free from old habits and comfort zones?

In our latest episode, join host Jessica Stipanovic as she sits down with Krys Pappius, an empowerment coach and author, for an inspiring conversation that dives deep into the journey of self-improvement. Krys shares her powerful 75-day transformation journey, where she ditched alcohol and embraced a routine of exercise, reading, and unwavering commitment that reshaped her life.

After a challenging year caring for her mother, Krys recognized the need for a reset. She embarked on the rigorous 75 Hard Challenge by entrepreneur Andy Frisella, committing to a regimen of physical exercise, hydration, reading, and personal reflection for 75 consecutive days.

In their candid conversation, Jessica and Krys explore the importance of authenticity, finding genuine support networks, and making choices aligned with personal values. They share stories and tips for personal growth, underlining the significance of having a coach to navigate life's challenges and opportunities.

If you're seeking a change or a fresh start, this episode offers invaluable insights and motivation to take that crucial step toward a more fulfilling life.

Krys's coaching business is grounded in four core beliefs, which serve as the foundation of her transformative work:

1. Purpose: We all have a unique gift to share with the world.
2. Strength and Wisdom: Each of us possesses untapped reservoirs of strength and wisdom.
3. Confidence: Living with confidence means knowing we can handle whatever life throws our way.
4. Birthright: We all deserve to feel alive and engaged in every aspect of our lives.

Connect with Krys Pappius further:
- Website: Mindset Coach | Krys Pappius
- Email: kryspappius@gmail.com

Learn how sticking to your values brings independence and happiness, and see how small changes with a supportive coach can make a big difference. 

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Sober Living Stories podcast. This podcast is dedicated to sharing stories of sobriety. We shine a spotlight on individuals who have faced the challenges of alcoholism and addiction and are today living out their best lives sober. Each guest has experienced incredible transformation and are here to share their story with you. I'm Jessica Stapanavik, your host. Join me each week as guests from all walks of life share their stories to inspire and provide hope to those who need it most. Welcome to another episode of the Sober Living Stories podcast. Our guest today is Chris Papias, an empowerment coach, speaker and bestselling author. Chris referred to herself as a social drinker, but the truth was that she was ending most days with a strong drink or two. It was a habit she wanted to kick, without much success, until she committed to a 75-day challenge that had a number of requirements, including no alcohol. The change in her quality of life has surprised even her, and, while the challenge is over, she is committed to an alcohol-free lifestyle. Welcome, chris, I'm so happy to have you on the show. Thank you.

Speaker 2:

Jessica, I'm glad to be here. I always like to share my messages and have conversations with great people.

Speaker 1:

That's wonderful. I'm interested in, of course, the 75-day challenge. There are so many sobriety online platforms that kick off a dry January or a sober October, which is essentially a 30-day challenge to go without and to see if you like it or if it's changed you. And when I heard your story that your 75-day challenge resulted in an alcohol-free lifestyle, I thought, wow, what better person to have on to share with listeners that? Wow, this works. And you being an empowerment coach, I would love for you to tell us what you do, why you do it and share insights with listeners on how they can live their best life.

Speaker 2:

As an empowerment coach, my mission is to help successful professional and entrepreneurial women who are experiencing empty success find joy in living again and get reconnected with life, because I have four core beliefs, and this is what drives what I do. I believe we all have a purpose in life and I believe that purpose is to share our unique gift with the world. I believe we all have a depth of strength and wisdom beyond our wildest imagination. I believe we have a birthright to live life with confidence, knowing that we can deal with whatever life throws our way. And I believe we have a birthright to feel alive and engaged in everything we do in life, and that's what I want from my clients, because I have that now, but it wasn't always like that.

Speaker 1:

Wow, you say birthright. Can you explain that Like it is your right to?

Speaker 2:

It's by virtue of being born on this planet as a human being that you have the right to reach your potential, have joy, have fun. This world has so many things to offer. I do it my way. For me it's, you know, being active, and you know I'm a very physical person. It doesn't have to be that way, but there are adventures for everyone in this life and I think we're hardwired to seek adventure, learn about ourselves and, like I said, reach our potential and do it confidently and with joy.

Speaker 1:

Wow, that's great. So can you talk to us about this 75-day challenge that resulted in a very positive lifestyle change for you recently?

Speaker 2:

It's called 75 part and I will prefix this by saying there's no science behind it. The challenge is this For 75 days, you commit to two workouts a day, one of which has to be outside, regardless of the conditions. You have to commit to reading 10 pages of a non-fiction personal development book. You have to commit to drinking a gallon of water a day, which means that there are nights where you get up you know two or three times to de-water. Whatever you commit to, whatever eating program best suits your body so they don't dictate that but whatever it is, you commit to it and then there's no sugar and no alcohol. So those are the six things you commit to, and you do that for 75. Oh, and you have to take a selfie every day, and I'm telling you that is very humbling, that's a humbling experience.

Speaker 1:

I'm already in. I'm already in on this. This is great, go ahead.

Speaker 2:

I accepted the challenge. For me, 2023 was a really it was a very difficult year. My mother died in ways that were the circumstances. She was 97. The circumstances were quite traumatic for my sister and myself several months of just really, really difficult time, and one of the things that really went down the tubes for me was self-care. So by the time the end of the fall came, I put on a lot of weight, I wasn't really work, I wasn't working out, I had brain fog, I was inflamed, I just felt and I had no energy. I just felt awful and I wanted to do a drastic lifestyle reset because that's not the life I wanted to live. And I heard a friend actually it was a colleague of mine did the 75 hard challenge and I saw the changes in her and I was quite amazed and I decided I want something drastic. This is drastic and I committed to it. And the one caveat on this challenge is, if you miss one of those six targets in a day, you have to go back to day one.

Speaker 1:

So there's no forgiveness, and I love that you shamelessly use the word drastic. Some people are like you know, don't go too hard, but yeah, drastic life reset.

Speaker 2:

I needed it drastic and because I'm a very physical person. Yes, I was a little nervous about these two workouts a day, but the workouts are what you make it to be. It could be a walk, it doesn't have to be a hardcore gym Workout. I did that five days a week. I go to CrossFit, so that was fine. In the morning I rediscovered swimming aqua fits. I started my day with my 45 minute walks because where I live we have beautiful urban trails, so this, really, it was very suited to what I love doing in life and what really brings me joy in life. So I had a leg up on that and I did, and I will admit that by day 75, my body was saying please, can we take a break. It was tight, it was, it was, it was hard, it wasn't easy. And what?

Speaker 1:

were the changes that you started to see. I mean right away, you know, within first week, and then no brain fog.

Speaker 2:

No brain fog and energy.

Speaker 1:

Wow, do you attribute that? No brain fog, because that's a big one when you're eating poorly, when you're exhausted. Yeah, that that's real. It's like your memory is gone. Did I do this? It's, it's real, it's. And so to have that elevated. Would you attribute that to the water, to the getting outside and fresh air?

Speaker 2:

I think. I think that maybe the water had something to do with it, but I think the no alcohol and the no sugar.

Speaker 1:

No alcohol, no sugar. Oh, sugar.

Speaker 2:

I think those for me, in my case, those were definitely key factors, because you know what it's like when you're tired, like you say you're you're, you're dealing with a lot of the emotional stuff and you reach for the easy, easy food, and easy food is very process. I'm someone who I live on my own and my full size dishwasher runs every day because I cook everything from scratch. I like cooking, I do it for myself and that's not what I was doing. I was reaching for processed foods. You know the easy stuff and there's sugar in everything. Peanut butter has sugar, for crying out loud.

Speaker 1:

But I understand when it's when you're busy or you're going through an emotionally difficult time and there's not many spaces in the day, it is very easy and necessary sometimes to just do the fast option and so to make that change is like a season that you're in that's difficult and then you break free and it seems like that's what you've done. So how about the habit of your daily alcohol intake? How did that shift? Was that hard?

Speaker 2:

No, I was lucky that way. For me, my alcohol consumption was simply a habit. I don't have an addiction to alcohol. It was a habit that I developed and it developed developed a long time ago, when I made the choice to go into law enforcement. I was, I was a non drinker, but it was a culture where you bonded, you know, you'd go at the end of the day, you'd go out, you'd go to bar, you'd have a drink and and it's not that I drank vast amounts, but it was a habit that I would have a drink or two every day. But by the time I started this 75 part and that I didn't like that. I didn't like the fact that at the end of the day, if you know where's my, I want to drink and I would get dressed and go out, you know, whatever the weather was, to get some alcohol if I didn't have any Right.

Speaker 1:

I would tell myself I don't keep it at home, right. You started making specifications and it becomes like a requirement. You know, and look at that flip. You know you said you'd get dressed and go out to go and have the drink or two and I love the 75 hard. What you said, regardless of the condition one of those workouts has to be outside. Yes, so if we could do that, we can do this.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you know, yeah, actually that's. I never even made that connection. That's funny. I never made that connection because at one point it was like minus 35 here. We had a real cold spell. I was like, okay, bundle up, you've got the clothes, go out and do it and go for a walk. So it was. So I'm very great, although there, like I said I, there's no science behind it, it's just a challenge, and my quality of life has significantly improved.

Speaker 1:

In what ways Could you share with us a couple of ways that it's improved Sure?

Speaker 2:

But I get up at six o'clock every morning and I'm either downstairs in my little home gym or I'm down at the pool. I rediscovered swimming, which I love. I do aquafit in the morning, or I swim or I do something, and in the evenings I end my days. Now, instead of with a drink, I ended up in the CrossFit gym working out, and on the weekends, like I said, I have a home gym. I have trails all over. I live in a beautiful, beautiful part of the country. We can hike all year round because our trails are at all altitudes and I'm outdoors and it's just for me. That's my happy place.

Speaker 1:

That's great Thank you for for going your morning workout to be here with us.

Speaker 2:

Oh, it's my pleasure.

Speaker 1:

Also I like the word you said. You use the word discover and I found when I stopped drinking alcohol myself that I, for example, I was invited to like a Denver Broncos game.

Speaker 2:

And.

Speaker 1:

I said oh, I don't, I don't really go to spectator sports, I'm not going to go watch a football game, it's not really my thing. And then I thought well, you know, I've never really done that without alcohol. So I went and I tried it and I loved it. It was so fun, what a great time. And I did that with restaurants and foods too. That's how I no, I don't eat that. And I thought, well, maybe I do, Maybe I do now. And so there was a whole discovery of of not only who I was, but what I did. And did you find any of that as well in your 75 days?

Speaker 2:

I love cooking and because I was being so suddenly, so physically active, I needed to get protein. So I had to look for new recipes. Pinterest was my friend and discovering that, with the staples that I normally have in my house, I can cook different things, prepare different things, use different spices. So that was fun. And for me, the big one was we discovering that I love swimming. I love, excuse me being in the water. You know, my father died in 2010 and he's the one who got me swimming when I was a kid and I I swim my laps and I think of my dad and, you know, miss him a lot.

Speaker 2:

It's a funny connection, what that's doing and it just it's a great way to start the day. It sets me up for, you know, being alert and relaxed, and I love it. For me, being physical wasn't a challenge and, again, for your listeners, you know if anyone is thinking that they might want to do this, you don't have to go hard the way I did. You go as hard you push yourself in, whatever that means for you, a workout. For some people who lead sedentary lifestyles can be a walk.

Speaker 1:

Can be a walk yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

One outside and something else.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's great yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And the benefits. Like I said that, this the lack of the brain fog. You mentioned forgetfulness. That is so true. Let's forgetfulness when things come up. I'm able to stay in my critical thinking mode when I have to, you know, problem solve things don't overwhelm me, just a really nice way to live and I love the unexpected benefit is you know how expensive alcohol is these days, fortunately, but I could imagine. That's right yeah.

Speaker 1:

That's true, it's. It would be also. You would save there. You would definitely save there. I often think about that when we go out to dinner and you know it's not part of my dinner, but you know if you have three or four drinks, you know throughout an entire evening what that could be. Or if you're at a party, it's like 10, I don't know. I don't even know how much alcohol costs anymore, but it's nuts it is absolutely nuts it's like everything else you know, Yep and anyone could look up 75 hard hard on online and research that and see if it was something they would want to do.

Speaker 1:

And when we do these like sober October and dry January, it's just a kickstart to initiate a lifestyle that you maybe you know, have contemplated but didn't know how to do, and I think community kind of plays a big part in that as well. Was there any kind of community for you while you were doing this support system?

Speaker 2:

Okay, so anybody who might be interested in this, I give you two pieces of advice. One, do not buy the book on Amazon. It is a fake. It's not written by Andy, his name is Andy something and the author of the book online is Andy friend. The book is only available through the website of the person who created this and Andy I can't remember his last name.

Speaker 2:

And second of all, there is a Facebook community and they're not very nice. If you're not hardcore, you know. If you ask any question about you know amending this for any reason, they just go after it. No mercy, it's not regular. I don't understand. In the end, I just left the Facebook group because I didn't appreciate it and, having said all that, I made a point of telling the coaches at the gym that I was doing this. I made a point to tell the people that I regularly work out with in the gym that I was doing this and I had amazing support. Having the support is important. I just caution people, the Facebook group is pretty harsh and do not buy the book unless you get it from the website.

Speaker 1:

So there's some positives and there's some negatives there with that.

Speaker 1:

But I think the, I think having that commitment, I love the categorized commitment. So you have your workout, you have your commitment to your diet guidelines, restrictions, and then you have your commitment to the gallon of water, which I think is so important, and the no sugar, no alcohol is just so key. And in talking about no sugar, no alcohol, I can't tell you how many guests that I've recently had on that talked about sugar addiction which I didn't even really think about. I mean, I it's just so front and center right now.

Speaker 1:

I'm eating, not just eating disorders, but food addiction, like going to something excessively, to stuff numb when we can otherwise be doing more positive things about it. So, and I think that kind of goes hand in hand with alcohol or drug addiction, because when we put that down years later we may pick something back up. It's not going to be that, but what is it? Is it going to be too much work, working out too much or eating excessively? So this is an excellent example of you trying something, having all these components and then still living alcohol free after it's done. I think it's really incredible because it speaks to the fact that it can really work, it can stick, I think that I think the key is to really want this.

Speaker 2:

I find a lot of people set New Year's resolutions. They're not connected emotionally to the why, to the reason why they are doing this.

Speaker 2:

I think it's really important to know the big why. What do you want? And I also think it's why are you numbing? We don't live self-harming lifestyles, which is addiction, is a self-harming lifestyle, and I don't care whether it's a habit or a chemical addiction. We're doing it for a reason. Everybody's behavior makes sense. That's one thing I know in my career in working with people in very challenging situations. Everybody's behavior makes sense and if you really take the time to understand why you're doing what you're doing, when you get to the core of it, that's when you're empowered to make real change. If you're committing to a dry month or whatever it is because your head tells you you should, you don't have an emotional commitment and I think it makes it harder to keep up with those lifestyle changes when that time frame is over.

Speaker 1:

I agree, I agree.

Speaker 2:

But when your heart tells you this is what I want, there is a bigger picture here. My bigger picture is I want to be healthy and free and living independently until I take my last breath. I want to be hiking until I take my last breath. So those are my top values our freedom, community and security. And this body, this machine, has to be in proper working order. In order to achieve that In order to achieve that.

Speaker 1:

I love the living independently. Yeah, yes, it's important. You know, I have children and I had my last child. I was 42. Oh, wow.

Speaker 1:

So you know I think ahead and you know I think my parents, my mom, just experienced a fall and you know we're going through a numerous things. She's a very strong woman but, yeah, there's some physicalities that are challenging Yep, Just happened this week again. So when I think of that, she's done a tremendous job at maintaining and being active in all areas, whether it's volunteering or her political stance and her dietary changes, and I think that's so important. It's not only important to her, it's important to me and it's important to my little one. Yeah, so it's just, it's really.

Speaker 1:

I love what you say. I agree with it 100%. I don't know anyone really who has given up alcohol for any for forever without having an internal decision made that their heart. You know it's a self-diagnosed disease and when you're done and you want to make change, you will make change, and I think that's across the board, for because it's not about whether it's you know something to drink or something to eat, it's about why. Yes, and I agree with that 100%. You know when you're ready, you're ready and this looks like a great tool with some excellent guidelines to get you there.

Speaker 2:

It's one of those things that's really way out and if you, if you are able to incorporate the guidelines into your lifestyle, if you can physically do that, it's great. I'm very physical. My mother, when she passed away she was 97 years old. She retired when she was 93. She was a very, very cerebral academic. For me, seeing her physical struggles because she was always a cerebral academic exercise that part of her life was not something that she nurtured and she paid the price within her health. Later on her physical health, she had limitations that were unfortunately, I hate to say, self inflicted. It was lifestyle choices, you know for nothing and I don't want that. So for me, something that tells me I have to work out twice a day, like that's just my jam.

Speaker 1:

Yeah. So can you talk a little bit about? You know you're an empowerment coach and the way that you started this interview was just really with those core beliefs. Could you go into those a little bit, because I think that's that's a really positive view. You know, and you talk about a birthright to have an incredible life. I agree with that. I think people should dream big, have a purpose and go after it, and that's certainly what I'm doing and I hope my daughter does, and you know I just it's just something that we don't talk about enough. You know, we just kind of glaze through life, thinking, you know, just treading water and trying to find spaces, and I have three children, 1811 and eight, and all different personalities. They're going to go after all different things in their life, but I want them to know that you, like, I want them to. Can you speak to that a little bit for listeners?

Speaker 2:

I believe that and it arises out of my life experiences. I didn't. It wasn't always like that, let's put it that way. I will go back to the early 2000s. I was in my 10th year in my career in law enforcement and it all looked good. It looked really good. I had all the trappings of success. You know, I owned the house, I owned the car, I had no debt. You know I traveled. Everything was good and it even appeared that I was good at what I was doing.

Speaker 2:

Prosecutors like getting my files because they knew they were complete. You know, I had some great incidents where I went into the burning building to get the grandmother that the family had left behind. I found in the middle of the night a fellow on a bridge rail and I was able to secure him. Mothers against run drivers had acknowledged my efforts to get impaired drivers off the road. It all looked really good, but the truth was that on the inside, my soul was dying and at the time I didn't understand why. All I knew was I was terribly unhappy and it all came to a head in December of 2003.

Speaker 2:

I was involved in an investigation. I got into a pursuit, my car accelerated I accelerated, not my car over a bridge deck with black ice and if you know what black ice is, you live in Florida. You may not, but black ice is like driving on oil and lost control of my vehicle. My vehicle stayed in motion very violently for some time and I knew that I might not survive. And in that moment I saw my life in its totality and I saw how disillusioned I was, how my life meant nothing. The work I was doing had no meaning for me and mostly I thought of all the dreams that I put up on a shelf in the dark to collect dust and I swear to myself that if I survived this event, things were going to change. I didn't know how, but things were going to change. Obviously, I survived, but I was.

Speaker 2:

I had significant injuries mental injuries, physical injuries and it was 15 months before I could go back to work and I clearly remember going back into work because I was now fit for duty, back into the work, into the locker room, putting on my uniform, putting on my gear, looking in the mirror, and my heart sank Because the person staring back at me was the same person who had been in that car. Nothing had changed. So then I recommitted and the journey really started, and the first thing I did was I was going to start having fun. So I was taking these dreams off the shelf. And the first thing I did was I went to Tanzania and I hiked up Mount Kilimanjaro, which is something I'd wanted to do since I saw the mountain in 1980. But I kept saying, oh, you can't do that. Who do you think you are? And I saw the world from the top of Kilimanjaro, in its beauty and in its texture, and I connected with a part of me that saw the world and life as full of possibilities. Like this was. This was an adventure that's over. I come home and nothing's changed. My life is the same. So take the other dream off the shelf. And this went on.

Speaker 2:

I ended up trekking across the Himalayas of Bhutan, I went to Western Mongolia, I visited the wild gorillas in Rwanda, I dove with whale sharks. I did all these things and they were great adventures and I'm privileged to have done that, do not get me wrong. But I kept coming home and it was a terrible, anticlimactic event because nothing had changed. The thing that was the common denominator was me. How do I get that aliveness and that joy and that sense of adventure and how do I get those feelings into my everyday life? There had to be a way to live life like that, and that started the inner work, and it took a long time Read the books, did the workshops, took the courses. I found most of them to be fluff because they give you permission to dream but they never tell you how. But I would get these little golden nuggets here and there and when I stood back and I saw those nuggets fit into a process, there's a method here and I started implementing that. That's when my life started to change and that's where I realized that, yes, I can feel alive and engage in everything I do. I do not believe in rainbows and unicorns. Life is not happy. Happy. That's not real life. But no matter how bad things can get, you can still be feel alive and engaged and remain a problem solver and deal with things and deal with the fallout and one thing that is so.

Speaker 2:

The three things you need to do is one is self mastery. Know yourself, understand your thoughts, what motivates you, what your triggers are, create a vision around what's really important to you and take action. Without action, I can't even get a cup of coffee if I don't do. Take action. If you want to create the life you want, you have to take action, and it's something you said earlier that I'm glad I can come circle back and touch on. It takes real honesty. You have to be honest about where you're at in your life. What is the pain, why is it a pain and how can I turn that wound into a scar so that I can learn from it and implement those learnings into my life. So I have no regrets.

Speaker 2:

My 20 years in law enforcement was not the highlight of my life, but I take everything I learned about human behavior, about myself, about what I'm capable of, about what's important to me, and I apply that now in my life and I help my clients do that. And I said to you at one point I don't think we're recording yet that I now understand why it was a bad marriage between me and law enforcement. My purpose in life is to make people feel seen, heard and valued, that they matter and that their life matters, and that's the mission of my business. If you compare my mission, my purpose, with the mandate of law enforcement, they're very different and that's where that edge was, that's where the misconnect was. I also believe if I had known my purpose, if I had known myself, I would have shown up differently in life. I would have shown up differently when I was in that uniform and my career would have been different.

Speaker 1:

Correct, yeah.

Speaker 2:

So that's where I come from.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you know I love this because you know we, just prior to you speaking about all of that we talked about, I was talking about the kids and what they say, and you said well, you know, for me, I had, you know, you had to go through this and do this work in order to get to be able to say those things. And the same is true for myself as well, and part of me, you know, as a mom says. Well, I would hope they wouldn't have to go through all of that, but the truth is it's twofold really. It's like their journey as their journey, their life is their life and they will go through exactly what they need to go through to come to their own realizations.

Speaker 1:

But what I'm really happy about is that, instead of taking our experiences here and you know, we did something with them, did the work and then came out to be able to believe the way that we believe, so that when we're walking around here and we're coming into contact with people, with your clients, with people on a day to day, with my kids, they're hearing that version and that's important. So they'll have their own journey, but they'll also be exposed to the solutions of mine, and I think that's true for what you do, you know. That's why it was such a strong power statement in the beginning. So if people aren't quite there, they can say, well, she's there, she's going to coach me on how I can grow this out, how I can get there, and I just think that's powerful and really important.

Speaker 2:

We are capable of so much. We just were not aware of it. So in the years in law enforcement, I dealt with a lot of people whose lives were turned upside down, and often through no fault of their own right. That's what you call a victim, and some of them, unfortunately, it was it defined who they were, but in other cases it really made them rise to the occasion and you know, they dug deep and they persevered and in my case, when I was injured, I could have just played, you know, rolled over and given up, but I but no, I wasn't willing to do that. I was I. It forced me, it was my wake up call to dig deep and do the work and not give up until I find the solution.

Speaker 2:

You don't have to wait until the universe comes and smacks you over the head with a two by four. How much better an option to say I'm ready to do this now. It's not easy because you have to start with being very honest about who you are and where you are, and that is not an easy thing to do. Aside from, it's not easy to admit to things in your life. We all have blinders on. We see life through the lens of our mindset. We don't know what we don't know. Very often I've run into people who've turned their lives around and I'll ask them, you know, especially when they had a troubled youth or something and they've come to make real, do something with their life, and I asked them what was the difference? And so many times it was somebody saw something in me that I couldn't see.

Speaker 1:

So true.

Speaker 2:

And they were willing to walk by my side and guide me and to me. That's what I do. I'm not an expert on you. I'm not an expert on any of my clients. I am simply a guide who manages to help you see your purpose and your strength and your wisdom and guide you as you start applying that to create the life that you really want.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I think it's really important what you just said, especially to listeners who are trying to overcome or in the process of early hardship or putting down something, because that is very difficult to do. But, the requirement is honesty and, secondly, what you said was so good you do not have to go all the way to the bottom before you choose to get off, like if you're looking at an elevator you don't have to take it to the ground floor where your life is leveled, and sure that's what it takes for some people.

Speaker 1:

But you can get off today. You can get off at any floor and say I'm going to step out and make this change If you don't like the life you have, if you don't have to tell anybody.

Speaker 2:

But you know, middle of the night you wake up and if you're if you don't like the life that you have, you can change that and it doesn't mean blowing up the life you have today. It's about learning, getting to know who you are and what's important, and honoring that. I don't know if you know what the wheel of life concept. So the wheel of life it's I use a 10 wheel of life and it just it's a wheel that shows the different compartments of your life. So the wheel of life is like your career, your money, your relationships, where you live. It's all the dimensions that you care to acknowledge in your life.

Speaker 2:

If you're not happy in one area of your life, if that's let's say, for example, that you are least in all those dimensions, the least satisfaction you get, the least satisfaction you get is in your career. It doesn't necessarily mean that the career is where you have to focus your attention, because if you improve another piece of your life, this may not be the focus point anymore. Do you know what I mean? Like, it's not always what we think we should focus on. That's actually the solution, you know. Go up to 30,000 feet and look at the entire life what's working and what's not working and maybe, instead of focusing on what's not working, if you focus on what's working and elevate that even more, then maybe this piece here won't be so draining anymore.

Speaker 1:

Sure, sure. And I think the importance of having a coach to help. You see that is so important. I know with I'm a writer, so I had written a rough draft. You know it was a mountain of edits I was up against. And when I got with my writing coach he said what do you feel good about? I said I feel I feel excited and good about building a platform. And he said then that's what you're going to do. You're going to put the edits away, go put that on a shelf for a couple months and go do what excites you. And sure enough, you know, because he gave me, I could have came up with that on my own, but I didn't until he kind of gave me the permission to, hey, step away from that. It's okay. And once I poured into what was exciting to me and what was working, then I became willing to head back into the edits.

Speaker 1:

So it's just, it's exactly what you just said.

Speaker 2:

And when you focus on what's giving you juice, your creativity expands. And that expanded creativity you can then take to your edits and see them through a different light.

Speaker 1:

And that's exactly what was supposed to happen. Now, how many times, though, do people, do we not do that Like? How many times do we focus in on the one piece that isn't working and not give ourselves permission to shelf it and to head in the directions of our lives that aren't working, so we can get that like revitalization and be like hey, and because, if you think about it, it's so true, because, when you go back to that, you're seeing it with different eyes, because you're yeah, you're in a different space.

Speaker 1:

Absolutely, that's invaluable piece of advice.

Speaker 2:

I think isn't it Maya Angelou who said do the best that you can, knowing what you do, and when you know better, do better. So the last thing you want to do, the last thing I want to do, is to have anybody get down on themselves for for not doing better. I want to acknowledge everybody for living life, for being alive, knowing what they know. Okay, you're doing the best you can based on what you know, what you know about the world and what you know about yourself. When you know better about yourself, you will do better, and that is a process and, I stress, it is never too late, ever too late For me in my world. I would rather live the last five minutes of my life knowing that I have changed direction and I now have hope that I'm going to create this better life for myself. If all I get of that is five minutes, then live the next 20 years doing nothing and being unhappy and still dying unhappy.

Speaker 1:

A lot of people may say well, I'm already this far into this career, why shift now? Or I'm too old for this, or my time has passed.

Speaker 2:

No, yeah, it's never too late. And, like I said, I don't ascribe to the school of thought that, well, if your career isn't working for you, just leave it and just do it. Sure, that's not. That's in this day and age especially. That is not a fair demand. It's not a realistic demand. Most people cannot just walk away financially. That's not realistic. Maybe when you find yourself you will find a way to find meaning in the work that you do. Let's face it, victor Frankel found meaning in living in a concentration camp. Man search for meaning. If he could find meaning as he tried to survive in a concentration camp, then I think that we can honor his memory by finding meaning in our life today, in whatever it is that we're doing. He wasn't special. His process was special.

Speaker 1:

What would you say your clients look like? Are they women entrepreneurs? Who do you serve? I?

Speaker 2:

serve women who, on the outside, everybody looks at them and go, wow, you have a great life. On the inside, they're unhappy. When you have all the trappings of success, when the image looks so good, it is really hard to say you're unhappy because there's shame. How could I be unhappy with all this? There isn't a lot of sympathy when you have all this. Yes, it's nice to be affluent and have access to resources, but if you're not happy inside, then it doesn't mean anything.

Speaker 2:

My clients, the people that I love serving, are successful women, professionals or entrepreneurs who, when they look in the mirror every morning, they go oh, my gosh, not another day. I wish life were different, I want more, there's got to be more. When they look at the future and all they see is more of the same and they're stressed, disillusioned, hired, fed up, burned out. But they still put on the mask and when they go in, they do their thing every day. It doesn't have to be like that. For some, it's a question of getting to the point where, yes, they move on. I had one client. Her dream was to leave her corporate job and become what's the word I'm looking for? Have her own business. My gosh, my brain just went anyway. Consultants, oh my goodness.

Speaker 1:

Consultant consultant. Okay, you have to leave corporate and become a consultant.

Speaker 2:

In the end, that is what she did. I have other clients who, when they found out who they were and what was important to them, they were able to incorporate things into their life so that they had a more rounded life, that life worked for them better, without having to leave the corporate job or whatever it was they were doing. So really, it's what works for you. I cater to where you're at and what you want. I'm not an expert on you. I help you become an expert on you, and there's a big difference there. I don't tell you what to do. That's not what a coach does. A coach helps you see the world in a way that empowers you to reach your potential.

Speaker 1:

In your offerings? Do you do one-on-one coaching solely, or?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I do one-on-one coaching. If what I say resonates with somebody and if they want to explore the possibility of working with me, then let's connect, let's have a conversation, let's see if we are in alignment. Let's see if what I offer will be a solution to your problem.

Speaker 2:

Where can they find you chrispapiuscom, they could also hop onto my calendar, which is simply Meet with Chris. If you Google Meet with Chris, you'll get to my calendar, and I invite people to do that when, yes, I want to change and they want to explore if I am the person who can guide them to make that change.

Speaker 1:

And your website.

Speaker 2:

Is chrispapiuscom.

Speaker 1:

And I think you have a unique spelling of Chris, so I want to just call that out here. So Chris is spelled K-R-Y-S and her website is wwwkrys-p-p-i-u-scom. Is there anything that you can say to anyone who is looking to make a change but is hesitant?

Speaker 2:

We humans are hardwired to maintain the status quo. We are hardwired to avoid change. This is not a reflection on any one person. This is we humans are hardwired that way Because when we need to be able to feel secure and we are secure in what is familiar and anytime you want to start making changes, those little inner voices are going to tell you what are you doing? Are you crazy? Because their goal is not to give you, keep you stuck in a life that you don't like. Their goal is to keep you safe Safe in the familiar. Their goal is not to bring joy to your life, to bring adventure to your life. It's simply to keep you safe.

Speaker 2:

So if you're feeling reluctant for any reason, know that you're not special. It's not a reflection on you, it's a reflection on the fact, it's a reflection of your humanity. And just know that stepping out of your comfort zone is a requirement for change. And you do it in baby steps, and I mean baby. I had a client who was really struggling and her first baby step was in the morning when she walked into work. She simply said good morning to people that she crossed Palswick. For her that was a giant leap, just to say good morning. And that started the journey. So I am not asking you to blow up your life. I'm asking you to embrace the fact that you don't like your life and embrace the belief that things can change. It's never too late.

Speaker 1:

So many positive things. Thank you so much for sharing your story not only your story, but your insight, your core values and your work with us, and I encourage listeners to reach out to Chris on her socials. Visit her website. I will include all that information in the show notes, and I'm just so glad to have had you on today, chris. Thank you for joining us.

Speaker 2:

Oh, thanks for the invitation. This was a great conversation.

Speaker 1:

Thank you for tuning into the Sober Living Stories podcast. If you have been inspired, consider subscribing and sharing with anyone who could use hope in their lives. Remember to stay tuned for more inspiring stories in the episodes to come. To view our featured author of the month or to become a guest yourself, visit wwwjessicastapanavikcom.