Sober Living Stories
Welcome to the "Sober Living Stories" podcast, a platform built on the power of personal stories. Each Tuesday, Jessica Stipanovic, your host, shines a spotlight on individuals who have undergone remarkable life transformations to inspire hope in listeners worldwide.
Each guest shares their story giving examples of bold beginnings disguised as endings and life lessons that teach how the darkest moments often hold the key to unlocking the brightest light.
This podcast inspires positive life changes. Whether you're sober curious, living an alcohol-free lifestyle, have overcome a challenge and lived to tell about it, or support someone who wants to shed a habit in light of a new one, our episodes promise to leave you feeling understood, hopeful, and motivated to create meaningful transformations in your life.
Join us for powerful new episodes every Tuesday where the most difficult life experiences serve to uplift and inspire. Regardless of your background or belief system, the "Sober Living Stories" podcast is your ultimate destination for uplifting narratives where hope shines from the most unexpected places.
In addition to featuring our weekly guests, each month on the "Sober Living Stories" podcast, we have the privilege of sitting down with a new author, delving into their story and the wisdom they've shared in their book.
Here's the exciting part: their book becomes the giveaway for that month.
Tune in every Tuesday for brand-new episodes and your chance to win the gift of a transformed life.
Sober Living Stories
A Story of Recovery: The Intersection of Faith and Sobriety in Darren's Life
If you or a loved one has ever suffered from addiction or mental health challenges, this episode is one you will not want to miss.
Meet Darren Serwas who with seven years of health and sobriety shares about his journey from the depths of addiction and bipolar disorder to a life of sobriety and faith.
This episode is a narrative of Darren's life-changing moments, from being introduced to alcohol at a young age, to run-ins with the law and time spent in psych wards to sanity divine interventions, and a life of freedom. Darren's story, steeped in spirituality and personal growth, isn't just his own—it echoes the losses and hard wins of many who've walked the line between chaos and peace.
The road to recovery is often paved with hardships—relapse, incarceration, and mental health challenges are just a few that Darren faced head-on. As we get into his narrative, we uncover the support systems and spiritual awakenings that rekindle hope for a new life. From the guiding influence of a former NA sponsor to a mother's unwavering tough love, these narratives showcase the transformative impact of embracing a higher power as you understand it and taking steps toward discovering your true self.
Spirituality isn't just a concept for Darren; it's the cornerstone of his newfound peace. Darren is currently living out his creative talents by writing a track that helps other addicts and alcoholics avoid temptation and find freedom.
Whether you're seeking inspiration or looking to share your story, the Sober Living Stories podcast is a testament to the life-altering impact of faith, support, and a commitment to a better life.
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Your story matters.
It all started with a divine moment. On a Sunday morning, as he sat in his car praying before church, a scripture spoke directly to his heart. But this divine intervention didn't stop there. Later that day, at a 12-step meeting, darren experienced an extraordinary coincidence. This is just one of many in his journey and his sobriety story. So join us as Darren shares his faith and how it directs him to the best version of who he is, and this is the Sober Living Stories podcast.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the Sober Living Stories podcast. This podcast is dedicated to sharing stories of sobriety. We shine a spotlight on individuals who have faced the challenges of alcoholism and addiction and are today living out their best lives sober. Each guest has experienced incredible transformation and are here to share their story with you. I'm Jessica Stepanovic, your host. Join me each week as guests from all walks of life share their stories to inspire and provide hope to those who need it most. Hi and welcome to another episode of the Sober Living Stories podcast. Meet Darren Sirwas. With seven years of sobriety, darren has seen firsthand the power of God's guidance in his story. Welcome, darren, it's so good to see you and have you on the show.
Speaker 1:Hi Jessica Darren and I have been friends for more than probably 15 years. And you know, just going to open it up and start from where you'd like to take us today.
Speaker 2:Before we get to the testimony about that scripture and stuff that happened in my car at church, I kind of would like to give my background a little bit too.
Speaker 1:That's great Love to hear it.
Speaker 2:So I was born and raised in the area, the Daytona Beach area, ormond. My parents divorced when I was about three years old. I had kind of two separate sets of rules in the houses I lived in, my dad being a Vietnam vet and having alcoholism and mental illness run on that side of the family. It was always an experience between the homes and stuff. So I kind of got this like duality, so to speak, of trying to grow up. And you know, I started surfing at an early age.
Speaker 2:I was introduced to alcohol by my father at too young an age, in my opinion about 12 years old, and when I was about eight I was at my grandmother's house for a Christmas party and that is when I first drank my first drink I was. I drank some cold duck and I drank too much drank like three glasses at eight years old and went in the other room and had the spins and all that stuff. And you know that was kind of. That was kind of how I was introduced to it. But like when I got a little bit older my mom and my stepfather didn't drink. I would go to my dad's and at 12, I started drinking by 15 years old. I clearly remember going to high school and junior high and stuff on Monday mornings and being hung over. It became a everyday habit and I was excited to go to my dad's on the weekend so I could get alcohol. But at the same time there was a lot of abusive things going on down there, mostly verbal but sometimes physical. There, mostly verbal but sometimes physical. It got to be heavy duty and anyways, it carried with me and as I got older, around graduation age, I started to have some mental problems.
Speaker 2:I made it to college at 18 at Flagler College in St Augustine, started experimenting with not just alcohol but marijuana and, you know, it became a way of life for me. I failed out of art school at Flagler College, basically, and came back home and started hanging out with some younger surfer dudes, you know, at Standish Approach in Ormond, and basically it was all about partying, surfing, working as little as possible and going to concerts almost every night of the week, you know, and so I was kind of like a surf punk, you know, and I really identified with the surfer culture, you know, and it's really funny to look back on now because I'm 54 years old and I really don't even surf anymore and I really don't identify with the culture anymore either. But I've changed a lot and I can get into that later. But anyways, as I progressed into this alcoholism and drugs around 91, I started to experiment with psychedelics, lsd, mushrooms and stuff like that and at that time I had a psychotic break. I was put in the Halifax psych unit for, I think, about three weeks until I got a diagnosis. They diagnosed me with bipolar disorder. They got me on medicine I think it was lithium at the time, you know and I did okay for quite a while until I didn't. I never stopped really drinking and using some drugs. You know, through this period I started to get DUIs. This period I started to get DUIs and it really really got bad. Through those years, from probably 91 to 2001, was a very, very dark period in my life I had.
Speaker 2:After I was diagnosed bipolar. I went to Gainesville, florida, with the intention of going to school, but using still was such a big part of my life that I never got into any classes there. I just majored in partying, you know what I mean. I stopped taking my medicine while I was there. I stopped taking my medicine while I was there and shortly, probably within a year's period of time I got spun out so bad that my parents had to really come and rescue me and get me back down here and get me on meds again. I was psychotic and delusional After that. That was around 96. Uh, I S, I was still drinking and doing drugs.
Speaker 2:I got my second DUI, uh, the first one was in South Carolina, that's a long story I don't need to go into. But the second one was down here in port orange and, uh, I was going to a local bar mixing narcotics and alcohol. They pulled me over and basically poured me out of the car. I was in a total blackout, you know, probably driving on the wrong side of the road type of thing. It's not even funny. And I am, I will have to say this. And I am, I will have to say this. I am totally grateful for every single time I got pulled over or arrested by the police for doing something wrong, because it got me to the point of being beaten, you know, until I could find recovery, fast forward to 99, I believe it was, or 2000. It might have been 2000. I got my last DUI kind of the same situation, you know, mixing high powered opiates and alcohol and pouring me out of the car in another blackout and I was set pretty much to lose my license for quite a while. And this is around the first time I had my first brush with recovery.
Speaker 2:Around the first time I had my first brush with recovery, I was riding my bicycle over the bridge from from Ormond to go to the bar. You know, because that's what we did, that's the kind of things I did. You know, I didn't have a license but I still needed to get my my drink on and I would literally spend my entire paycheck. I was working at a local paint company. I would spend my entire paycheck pretty much in one weekend and I was very depressed. I was on my meds, but very depressed. I was riding my bike over the bridge and I looked over the side and I was thinking about jumping at that point in time and just ending it. You know semi-suicidal and of all things.
Speaker 2:I was living at my grandmother's house and she lived on Rosewood, which is real close to a local AA recovery house called the Easy Does it Club, and I just remember that Easy Does it Club was down there and I was like I feel the Holy Spirit right now. Anyways, I said you know, something's got to be better than living like this. And I'm going to cry, man. Wow, I walked into that Easy Does it Club. I sat there, I went to meetings every day. I probably did more than 90. And 90. I did.
Speaker 2:I did a lot of meetings and I became a part of that place, you know, for a long time, and that's all I knew. And you know I started to grasp that there was another way of life and I wasn't living it. You know what? I started to grasp that there was another way of life and I wasn't living it. You know what I mean. And I started to hear things there and you know wisdom of people that had been sober a while. And you know people that would like to sponsor me.
Speaker 2:And you know I started to grab hold of some guys in the rooms and, you know, started to get a little bit of recovery, although you know I was kind of what my sponsor called at the time a half measures kind of guy.
Speaker 2:I wasn't willing to go to any length to stay sober. You know what I mean. And I had this like lustful desire that there might be just some way. You know that I could still get away with drinking or something. And what I was doing at the time is like I would go to meetings and I started to be introduced to people outside of the clubhouse which is good, you know too, and but I would go to meetings and I would immediately leave the meeting to say it was eight o'clock meeting and ended at nine and I would make my way over to the nearest bar to hang out with my old friends and, like you know, drink a Diet Coke or something at the bar, and then eventually it wound up. You know, I was drinking near beer which is non-alcoholic beer and somebody had to tell me at one point in time that like non-alcoholic beers for non-alcoholics.
Speaker 2:You know and you know what I mean and like I had to learn the hard way, like, uh, it's been a process, so anyways, um, I started drinking again, you know, and I would get, I would come back in, uh, get a sponsor last a month or a few months, 10 months or a year, and then right back out again and stuff, and uh, anyways, um, uh, this lasted. I got about five years sober and then I went back out. I got about five years sober and then I went back out. So about 2006, I started to go in and out and I ended up in 2008.
Speaker 2:I came in through the back door of a Narcotics Anonymous meeting. I really liked their literature and stuff like that and uh started working that program and uh, it worked for me. I, I, I wrote uh on my steps and I literally had uh about you know, six inches of paper writing, because there's a lot of writing in Narcotics Anonymous. It's very good, beneficial for somebody as sick as I was, you know, and anyways, I got some clean time. I went back to college, I got a degree in occupational therapy assisting. I thought that was going to be my life. I found it to be very stressful for me, you know, being in the medical field and stuff like that. And anyways, I had, I had gotten three years clean and the other fellowship I call it the other fellowship because I came from AA. You know I got three years clean. You know I got three years clean in NA. I moved to a new location, I got, I started going back to church. I ended up in a Pentecostal church. I got baptized. You know, I thought things were going to be different for me still yet I was attending NA meetings.
Speaker 2:I had a short duration relapse and I was living in Flagler County in a trailer, I was working as an occupational therapist at a nursing home and under a lot of stress, you know, and I ended up drinking one night and maybe for a couple of weeks drinking one night and maybe for a couple of weeks. And then I came back in, start putting together some more time. This is in around 2010, 2011. And I was at an NA meeting and, being a dual diagnosis addict which mental illness being a part of my story I was at this NA meeting listening to a guy that I respected and he was talking about how he had gotten off his psych meds and stuff like that and me without consulting a doctor. I thought it would be a good idea for me to uh stop taking my psych meds and and uh that this is uh going around 2015. Uh, so around that time I stopped taking my meds, you know, and uh, I got spun. In a couple of weeks I was psychotic and delusional.
Speaker 2:Um, I had um, what's that now?
Speaker 1:yeah, I don't want to interrupt your, your flow, your, your story here. I think it's, I think it's incredible all the things you're saying. But I think it's good to put a little disclaimer in here for listeners, because what you said is so right on. Like you know, without consulting a doctor is when you you know if you're on, you know, medication for a mental illness. It's. It's so important to consult a doctor before adjusting that or going off of it, so go ahead.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. And uh, you know, uh, I don't want to segue in here, but I had a good friend and you know him too, and he had a long history of not doing what he was supposed to do, you know and anyways.
Speaker 2:But I ended up 2015,. I had been going to a different church and I got off my meds. I was going to a church in daytona and and I was still doing meetings, of course, but I kept stopped taking my meds. I was, I was totally out of my mind. Uh, at manic, because I am bipolar I was manic. I was going to meetings, still off my meds, saying how I got delivered and all this stuff and I, I wasn't delivered by the Lord or anything like that. You know, I just was crazy. And, uh, I had a Subaru at the time. Um, I took off to my uncle's house in North Carolina and God protected me through this whole situation because I don't know how I lived through the next year, year and a half. I drove up there through the mountains, north Carolina, maggie Valley, silva, all that area. I was driving down these two lane roads in my Subaru, going at high rates of speed, you know, and I don't know how I didn't end up dead. You know, I was up there. My uncle knew there was something wrong with me because he had experienced it before I got thrown in a psych unit for a while and it wasn't pretty and I still refused to take my meds at that time. Somehow I was able to get back here to my house in Ormond and my parents really had a hard time with me because I wasn't sleeping, wasn't taking my meds, you know, and uh, I was up all night. I would go down to the local uh clubhouse and I'd be there at five o'clock in the morning when they're making coffee and stuff, driving people crazy, and uh, anyways, uh.
Speaker 2:The next couple of years, like I said, were just pure hell. I, my car got repossessed. I had an old NA sponsor that lived in Venice, florida, which is where I'm going here on vacation this weekend, and I went, I got on a bus to see him from here to Tampa and then I got another one from Tampa to near Venice and he picked me up and he said look, this is the stipulation If you don't straighten out in a month I'm going to have to kick you out of my house. And he was nice enough to let me live there. Well, guess what? I didn't want to take my meds, I refused, uh, and I was shortly put on the street with basically a bicycle and the clothes on my back and, uh, I became homeless everywhere, from, uh, venice and points North, to Bradenton, all the way down to Naples, florida, and I was.
Speaker 2:I don't want to go into a bunch of it, but it I was incarcerated probably about six times and about that many times in psych units I had. I weigh now right now I weigh about 220 pounds. At the time I had lost so much weight from just walking and riding bicycles, I was eating out of garbage cans and I weighed 157 at the time, you know. And again, just if anybody can identify with being in a turtle suit in a jail cell because that's what they put you in they call it a turtle suit and it's basically a green ribbed suit. It's just for people with psych problems in jail.
Speaker 2:I was in Sarasota County Jail. I was in Lee County Jail the last time I got put in jail. Well, let me back up a second, a good friend of mine over there who also has a podcast, ironically, I was at an NA meeting off my meds over there and my mom had called to have me psych eval, you know, and Sarasota County Police showed up at the meeting and they stuffed me and cuffed me right in front of the people at the meeting and stuff. So it was quite, you know, it was quite embarrassing. But, ironically, this girl I've stayed in touch with her and we were like really good friends now and uh, and I enjoy going over there to see her and just prove what you know, having God and recovery can do so, uh, but anyways, my last time in jail I and I had, you know, I got to share this.
Speaker 2:I, I started getting on my knees in jail, you know, and praying, uh, all of a sudden, like there's a story in the Bible about Nebuchadnezzar coming back to himself after he was like an animal living outside and he was a king at the time. And anyways, I came to myself and, like you know, it might be a good idea for me to start taking my medicine again, you know, and yeah so, but you know I was praying and then, lo and behold, a, at the same very same time, a recovery, or these people that help over in the jails in Sarasota, it's a, it's a program called Centerstone got me into what is called mental health treatment court and you know I got released on the terms that you know I would start taking my meds again, and so, anyway, I got released from jail, jail eventually, uh, I got released to a psych unit over there in sarasota and then to the salvation army. I contacted my mom and and this is uh, 20, uh, 16, uh, I believe I I'm something bad with dates sometimes. Anyways, I got released and and I came. I believe it was May. It was either May of 2016 or May of 2017. I think it was May of 2016. Maybe 2017.
Speaker 2:But I came back home and I don't know. I just being through near death experiences on the street and in jail and I don't have to go into all that, but it was rude. I had some brutal, brutal experiences in jail and on the streets and stuff and I just surrendered. I surrendered to recovery. I surrendered to taking my meds as prescribed. I just said, you know whatever it takes and you know I whatever, whatever fight was left in me to use drugs and alcohol, narcotics and all that stuff, and it was gone. You know I had surrendered to this way of life and, wow, I am so grateful that I did, you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, you know it's funny. You say the word fight, because I remember saying well, I'm fighting with it, I'm fighting with this, and someone said to me see, you're not quite there yet, cause you're still. That word shouldn't even be in the sentence anymore. Okay, and you just said it you know that surrender right and I didn't have that yet at the time. So that's really good and thank God for moms right Like making the hard decisions in the backgrounds, right.
Speaker 1:So thank God for those parents that are watching this all unfold and making the difficult decisions and bringing it back home and stuff.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's tough. Let's take a moment to hear a recovery story from one of my sponsors. At the age of 25, recently married and a new father, jack found himself in a Texas rehab facility detoxing After 10 years of addiction. He was finally able to admit that it was time to get help. Not only did Soberlink allow him to be accountable and track his sobriety, soberlink allowed Jack to prove to himself and others that he could make the change he had always hoped for. Soberlink allowed Jack to prove to himself and others that he could make the change he had always hoped for. Soberlink is the portable sobriety tracker taking the recovery world by storm. It has built-in facial recognition sensors that detect cheating and instant results sent to contacts. It's the number one accountability tool for keeping yourself honest and rebuilding trust. Visit wwwsoberlinkcom backslash sober dash living and check out the show notes to click the link and receive $50 off your device today. Now back to our guest.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, and it, the first two or three years was very difficult. It was very dark for me. But I started going to meetings again, of course, right away. I knew that's where the help was and, ironically, I got to share this. You know, I, I started working through the steps process, and, and, and I've been able to make some amends, of course, and, and. Part of the process, of course, is just living amends and and and living differently and not doing the same stupid stuff over and over. You know, and but this one guy that that I had a real big problem with at the Easy Does it Club when I was off my meds and it almost came to fisticuffs, you know, and stuff, and anyways, I was afraid.
Speaker 2:I set foot back in the Easy Does it Club and he basically said you're not welcome here, you can't come here. You know, because of my past behavior and man it was, it was tough, and so I I had been, I had been getting better jobs and let me tell you, when I came back in I start they told me like I would never work again, I should just be on disability the rest of my life. You know what I mean. And uh, but God had different plans. So I worked all these crappy jobs and I started to have some success.
Speaker 2:Um, and about four years ago, uh, I ended up getting back into the paint business. Uh, that was my career, uh, that I had chosen in the past before I got sober. And I started to have some success and I was at a local restaurant and this gentleman from the Easy Does it Club was there. He saw me and you know, his eyes got a little big, I think, when he saw me. Anyways, he, he sat at another table and, uh, then, so a few weeks later, I was there again. He was there and I bought his breakfast, you know.
Speaker 2:And and so we uh struck up a conversation. You know, and uh, you know it, I was it, it was like, it was like that. I made amends for my behavior. I talked to him, you know, and uh, that resent and I was afraid of him. You know. Anyways, that resentment was gone and uh, that was cleared up. I can go back to that club again, you know, and uh, and and the. But the ironic thing is is he passed away not far after that. So, you know, I was very grateful to have that, that kind of. You know, and that's just one of them. There's there's a lot of those kinds of things that have transpired over the years, you know. But moving further in recovery, oh, go ahead. Were you going to say something?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was just. I was just curious as to um I I think this is also so important and you know, yeah, so that, what year are you in about now?
Speaker 2:Well, I, I, my, my clean date is 12, 22, 16. So I'm over seven years, you know, yeah, going on seven and a half years, but uh, you know, I've worked all 12 steps in the NA fellowship. I'm uh working step four again because uh, of that, uh and uh, getting some help with an NA sponsor. I, uh, I recently, about five weeks or six weeks ago, I started attending ACOA meetings, um, which is just unreal. I, I, I've got the book here, I behind me. It's a big, thick book and uh, I've been reading it and I'm like, wow, that is defining me. So what I'm trying to say is what is ACOA?
Speaker 2:So ACOA Adult.
Speaker 1:Children of Alcoholics. Is that what it is?
Speaker 2:And you know, there's a new meeting at the club and you know, and I started, I just I didn't mean to go there, it was like a God thing. I just remember there was a two, two o'clock meeting at the easy does it club and I walked in there and it's not an aa meeting, it was an aco a meeting and they're starting to read from their literature. I'm like, holy, this is me. You know they have a laundry list and and, um, an aco way. It's kind of a hybrid program for children and alcoholics. You don't have to be a child of an alcoholic to qualify for the fellowship either.
Speaker 2:Anyways, I was like they read the laundry list and I'm like, wow, and started reading some of the literature. I'm like, wow, I qualify for this program. And apparently, from what I understand, wow, I qualify for this program. And apparently, from what I understand and from what I've been reading, people get some real deep down recovery from that fellowship. So you know, and so, anyways, I started, I bought the book and I've been reading it real slowly, you know, and just enjoying it. So yeah.
Speaker 2:So what happened?
Speaker 1:What happened? Take us to that moment. You just recently had you know you talked about, like the, I think there's so many coincidences nothing happens by mistake and so tell us about that, cause I know you have a strong faith background and I think they go hand in hand for sure.
Speaker 2:Yes, so you know one of the things and I got to go with the basics here too. So one of the things that I said when I was in jail was that I got on my knees. And you know, I know this old timer and AA that's been sober over 40 years and he says I get on my knees in the morning, I get on my knees at night and what happens in between is gravy. You know what I mean. But anyways, it says in the AA literature that if we fail to enlarge our spiritual you know program that basically we're in trouble. So this has been a progressive thing for me. So this has been a progressive thing for me. I started attending this church that I had gone to a long time ago in the Palm few years I developed this regular habit of prayer and I work in New Smyrna. I pray in the morning. I don't even listen to my radio in my car very often anymore, I just turn it off. I pray in my car for a half hour before I go to work and stuff like that. And prayer has become a larger part of my recovery now and when I do it I feel a whole lot better. I'm able to handle my work situation, my challenges better, you know, because of having a closer walk with God.
Speaker 2:Today, you know, I'm in the other literature, in the other book, which is the Bible. You know, every day I've been reading the Bible, and usually in a year, every I'll read through the whole Bible in a year. I have incorporated that in my life. But anyways, that story, and it's very true, I went to church one Sunday morning. I will go in and I'll pray, I'll go back out in my car for a few minutes and I was sitting there and you know it wasn't my thought, but I got this scripture in my mind and it was, I believe, 1 Corinthians 1.13. I didn't come across it, it's like the Lord spoke it to me. So, anyways, I went to church, I did the church thing and immediately after I decided to go to this meeting.
Speaker 1:So what was the scripture? Though, go back to the scripture yeah, I'm trying.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to find it okay.
Speaker 1:So 1 corinthians 10, 13, it says no temptation has overtaken you, except what is common to mankind yes, god is faithful. He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.
Speaker 2:That's it, yes, so thank you for that. Ironically and not ironically, it's a God thing, but I just happened to go. Well, there's this meeting up in Flagler County. So after church I knew my friend Max would be there and I showed up there and I was sitting there. I got there right about the time of the meeting, and you know it. This doesn't normally happen at meetings, but Max's family is also in the program and his mom read that scripture at the meeting right after I had been in my car praying before church and said the same thing.
Speaker 2:But to follow up on that, you know, I was blown away and I shared at the meeting. I said I was just thinking that scripture in my car a little while ago, you know, talking about staying stopped from drinking, you know, and temptation and stuff, staying stopped from drinking, you know, and temptation and stuff. But to fast forward to the next day, it was around the time of the national championship game in football I had an old friend like start sending me pictures of pictures of beer and stuff like that, you know, and that was on a Monday. I was like wow, and so I wasn't going to go to my AA home group meeting that night. But when I started getting sent those pictures of the beer pitchers and stuff, I was like I better go to my meeting.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. So it was just like God spoke through the word of God and through this alcoholic at the meeting reading the scripture, and you know it's just those things that happen in life. And you know, the thing that I've discovered about listening to God is you've got to be very quiet. You know God speaks to me in a still small voice and you got to shut the media off. You got to shut out the radio and just talk to God and listen to God. You know what I mean. For me personally, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, I, I, I. I'm happy that you said that, because I think it's so true. You know, um, oh yeah, there's, it's just the busyness, like the spirit of busyness. And we think that's not something, but it sure is Right. And the media, and the social media, the scroll, the. There's not a moment, much anymore in a lot of people's lives where they are just quiet, just like, think of kids.
Speaker 1:They're like I'm bored and you're like, yes, I'm so glad to hear you say that Because a lot of times we just don't give ourselves the moment to just be, you know. So thank you for pointing that out and also for pointing out that scripture, because I used to think of that scripture often, many, many years ago, and because it resonated so much with me and it comforted me in the fact that he will not give me anything which he will not find me a door to get out of.
Speaker 1:And I just said that to my kids, probably a week ago in relation to just saying hey, if you're ever tempted to do something you know you shouldn't do, like you can always make the other decision, because there's always going to be a way, yeah, so thank you for bringing that up as well. And how often in 12-step meetings. They don't really talk scripture.
Speaker 2:So that's the big coincidence that day? No, no, exactly. And ironically too, I've had a long history with this family over the years. I've known him for a long time. When I started going to meetings, I started going to some NA meetings down in New Smyrna down there, and I've known him for years. I didn't know that his parents were going to be at the meeting, which they they're also been sober a long time.
Speaker 2:But for her to quote the same exact scripture I was just thinking of, I mean, that is no mere coincidence, you know, and uh, but uh, I was going to say something funny. You know, uh, I was at a I go to Sunday school, which a lot of churches don't have anymore, but a brother of mine was talking about allowing yourself to be bored. Today, you know, we just can you be bored? You know? I mean we have to. It seems like we have to be doing something all the time and it's such a rushed and hurried life and, you know, going back to the old time, people, like you know, there was a you know a psychedelic guy that said drop out. You know, and I feel like, you know, I just kind of I got to shut everything down and just spend time with God. Sometimes you know, and you know what I mean. It's like Great reminder.
Speaker 2:Yes, there's so many distractions these days. We got our phones in our hands constantly. We could watch the TV. There's a million different shows on Netflix, you know, and but God's saying to me like, hey, spend some time with me today, you know you have creativity in your background.
Speaker 1:You went to school for art. I know you're working on some, some literary works. You want to talk about those a little bit.
Speaker 2:Sure, um, well, you know I, um, I've always been a writer. I wrote poetry. Um, you know I, as a matter of fact, I've even considered writing my like an autobiography. My own pastor actually wrote one himself about his experiences and I like to do that. But I wrote what we were talking about before with First Corinthians 1013. 1 Corinthians, 10, 13,.
Speaker 2:I'm writing a tract which is being sent back and forth between me and the pastor to be used as a tool in some of the apostolic faith churches for people that might be struggling with alcoholism, you know, and temptation and stuff. And you know I'm not in a giant hurry to accomplish any of this, but I just let it flow naturally, you know. But also I've been writing and writing down whether I'm at a meeting or just remembering stuff. I want to write like a coffee table book to be published eventually. I want to write like a coffee table book to be published eventually, about recovery, wisdom and quotes that you, like, you will not hear anywhere else, you know, and I'm trying to make it as unique as possible. And again, I'm not in a rush or a hurry to do this, it's just going to flow naturally.
Speaker 1:I really commend you for sharing and having the courage to share your your story and the the mental illness part of it as well. So so many people can relate to that and a lot of time. It just really mirrors the alcoholism addict um symptoms and in addition to and the dual diagnosis is there one thing that you want to say to anyone who's struggling, that has alcoholism, addiction, mental illness or who lacks faith.
Speaker 2:And it all starts, like I said, with that guy that taught me. You know, getting on my knees in the morning and night I have to humble myself before my maker, and you know and then just spending time with God. You know, there was a time in my life where I had to have the radio on constantly. I had to be Blair. It's like I fed on chaos and today I feed on peace, which is God through the Holy Ghost. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So good stuff. Yeah, thank you so much for sharing. I'm so glad you came on today.
Speaker 2:All right, Love you Jess.
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